Midnight. All I could hear were the trickling drops of rain in my windowpane and the tic-tacs of my wall clock, my mind and my body in complete paralysis. 4 to 5 breaths later, I fell asleep without something to look forward to the next day, goal-less and dream-less. I woke up crossing my fingers that as I opened my eyes I wish I am somewhere else but what seemed to welcome me was the common smell of my room, the everyday hassles my current world brings, the heartaches and frustrations, the morning rush. But really, they do not matter to me anymore. Everything works in monotony and I am finally getting the hang of every bit of it. I lost all those drive and inspiration. Hopeless but do not give a damn. Uninspired in a sea of passionate individuals. Accepts mediocrity in a world where people would kill for power and strive for excellence. Up for everything life offers. All those past experiences did not mold me to become the better version of myself but instead taught me to shrug away everything good or bad that comes my way. Standing still where everything is fast-paced. Numb where everyone is feeling the pain and use it to rise again. My life is a stagnant water waiting for yet another rainy day to be taken by its current. I feel so lost and doubts are flooding my mind. Devastated but tears do not shed no more. Confused in every sense of the word.
Come the sunrise, then the sunset, and there it was -- midnight again. The trickling of the raindrops and my wall clock's tic-tacs were music to my ears; my mind and my body in complete paralysis. 4 to 5 breaths later, I was in a deep slumber. Another day is coming but it does not matter to me. Not anymore.
